Filming ER!

Well today was the big day! That's right, it was Taco Bell night! Woohoo! I love my Nacho Bell Grande.

It was also the day of my ER shoot! For those who don't know, I booked a small co-star role on an episode of ER. It's going to be the 5th episode this season called "Ames v. Kovak". I play the part of a patient with a leg injury who is being taught how to use crutches by Dr. Abby Lockhart, who is played by the beautiful Maura Tierney. For those who don't know Maura Tierney, she was the main character on that show News Radio and the love interest in Welcome to Mooseport.

So I show up for my 12:30pm calltime at Warner Brothers Studios in Burbank. This kicks ass because people are going around on tours of the studio and I'm there to be on freakin ER! And of course, my retarded body couldn't let me be in top shape for the shoot. I got a cold this week and so I'm stuffed up and congested, but I'll be damned if I miss this shoot. So I drug myself up (more than usual) and pretend that my voice is just a little lower and sexier than usual I'm a little nervous because it's my first tv show shoot and I haven't watched ER since it started, so I was hoping I didn't make myself look stupid. I could see myself roll up and be like where's George Clooney and Anthony Edwards??? Not around? What about the black guy from Coming to America? No???? You want me to leave with security? Ok...

I show up and they take me to my trailer. Hell yes! My trailer is tight. I have a couch, my own bathroom, tv, dvd player, radio, vcr, microwave and fridge. This trailer is much better than the one I had when I did the Sprint and Eastwood commercials. So I make myself comfortable in the trailer by blowing up the toilet with my preshoot poop.

Then I put on my wardrobe and head off to make-up and hair. I had already got my hair did before I left, so they didn't touch my weave or dreadlocks I have started sporting. They did put make-up on me and made me look beautiful. I felt like a $100 hooker afterwards! It was awesome.

Then I went onto the ER stage. I was by myself, so I was really timid and scared because it was my first TV show and the first time I've ever been on a TV show set with the exception of the stand up comedy shows I've done. So I walk in and I'm instantly on the ER set, in the hospital that you see on tv. I stay in the corner because I don't know where to hang out at and I don't want to risk walking into a shot by mistake. Finally, I ask one of the PA's to take me somewhere safe and I hide my face in her boobs to punctuate my fright. She takes me to a part of the set that is the doctor's locker room on the show and I chill in there til it's time for my scene.

So it's time for my scene. I walk out onto set and the director Richard Thorpe (who is awesome. He's directed numerous ER episodes) introduces himself to me and then the rest of the main cast who is in my scene introduce themselves to me, including: Maura Tierney, Parminder Nagra who plays Dr. Neely, Shane West who plays Dr. Ray Barnett and was Tom Sawyer in League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, freakin Mekhi Phifer from 8 mile and Honey and a grip of other movies, and last but not least, John Fuckin Stamos from Full House!

I was like oh my god, Mekhi Phifer and John Stamos just introduced themselves to me. Mekhi was all buff and Stamos still looked good but was skinnier than I expected. You can tell that he is the new George Clooney on the show. I'm a huge fan of John Stamos, so meeting him was icing on the cake....mmm...cake... sorry, where was I? Oh yeah, it was tight because I was the guest co-star in the scene, so though I wasn't a regular, I still got treated like one.

And Parminder is FINE AS HELL! I am in love with her now. She is beautiful. She's Indian and has an English accent. I was hoping to start up an onset romance with her, but stupid John Stamos and Mekhi kept talking to her. I was like damn Uncle Jesse, back up, let me get a chance. Anyway, she's very sweet and her accent is sooo sexy and she did smile at me a few times and I drooled back at her.

Maura was really cool too. She is the one I did my dialogue with. She didn't really chat with me when not filming though, but that's ok, someday I'll be up there with them and then they'll all want to be my friends and I'll be like...ok, thanks for being my friend. Wanna have a sleepover? No? Too soon?...

So after being there 2 hours it was lunch time. This is how sad I am. Before the shoot, instead of being excited about being on ER, I was excited to see what kind of catering a big budget show like ER has. I couldn't wait for the free gourmet meal! Then my hopes and dreams were dashed. They didn't cater. You had to go find your own food. So I sulked away and went and ate at the Warner Brothers Cafeteria. The food was good, but I had to pay for it. I didn't feel so bad though, because John Stamos, Parminder and Maura also ate there. I badly wanted to sit with them. I felt like such a loser, like one of those high school movies where I'm the new kid and I see the cool table and wish I could sit with them. So I chickened out and ate by myself like the loser that I am.

So after lunch, we finished up some pickup shots of my scene and I was wrapped at 4pm. So I did 2 1/2 hours of work and will make more money that I do working 40 hours per week for 4 weeks. I love acting!

Oh yeah, so after I introduce myself to everyone, we read over the lines and then rehearse the scene. Then they call for second team. So all the extras go to their places and this guy comes over and sits where I usually sit for the scene. I'm kind of like whoa, thinking this guy is trying to steal my scene. It's like prison and he was trying to take my food. Then he introduces himself to me and tells me that he's my stand-in! What! I have my own stand-in! PIMP! The other main actors had stand ins too, people who stand in your spot so they can do lighting and practice camera movements and the main actors don't have to be there. That was so tight that I had a stand-in, though I feel sorry for the other guy because he was a stand in for me, a nobody. I'm sure he's not braggin about that at the end of the day.

So all in all, it was an awesome experience. I felt like a lost little kid that didn't know what to do most of the time, but when it was time to act, I did my thing and the director even told me later that I did great. So I got my first TV show appearance out of the way, and ER isn't a bad way to start. Hopefully it'll open more doors and lead to bigger things.

Thank you to everyone who's been sending me good wishes and thoughts. I don't know how many times I heard "break a leg!...get it? because you have a broken leg in the show...haha" You guys rock!