Viva Las Vegas!

Great News! I'm going to be going to Vegas for free in October. I competed this past week in the Laugh Across America Competition. This competition goes around to 15 different cities nationwide and has four categories: Mainstream Stand Up, Youth, Variety/Parody, and Comedy Club Pick. The Comedy Club Pick is the professional category where the comedy club the auditions are being held at picks comedians to perform. The Variety/Parody is the different kind of comedy where people sing or use props, etc. Youth is for people under the age of 18. And finally there is Mainstream which is the main category for regular comedians. I won the Mainstream Category for San Francisco.

Now some of you hard to please people may be like, "Why didn't you do the Comedy Club Pick?" "You get paid to do comedy, are you scurred of competition?" And to these people I say, stop writing in my blogs and get out of my head, you damn evil voices. I wanted to do the Comedy Club Pick, but in order to do that the Comedy Club that is holding the auditions has to invite you. The auditions were held at Cobbs Comedy Club. I've only performed there once, so the people there don't know me and I don't know them. Therefore when we see each other on the street, we just stare at each other awkwardly.

But it's a good thing I didn't do the Comedy Pick because San Francisco was the only city to not have a Comedy Club Pick advance to the finals. How embarrassing. Even Cleveland had a Comedy Club Pick. Who in the hell does comedy in Cleveland professionally? Maybe Drew Carey returned.

So yeah, I'm stoked. They will pay for my trip and put me up in the Golden Nugget for 5 days, which means 5 days of gambling, which means 5 years of debt to pay off because I just can't say no to Roulette or strippers. I will be competing against the other winners in the Mainstream Category for a whopping $1000.00. So if I win the money, then that means 20 more minutes of gambling, a private lapdance and an extra seafood buffet.

Now to be honest, I don't really care too much about the comedy competition portion. I am excited about being able to perform in the Las Vegas Comedy Festival in front of industry people. Hopefully I perform in front of and impress the right person who can make things happen for me. And hopefully they'll be from the entertainment industry, because I'm tired of being recruited by Las Vegas Pimps. (They make me feel so good about myself, it's hard to tell them no, especially if they pimp slap me.)

So who knows, this Vegas thing could be huge and open new doors for me or it can turn out to be just a free trip to Vegas. Either way, it's a win win situation. If your in Vegas, come and check me out. I'll be the one dry humping Siegfriend and Roy. Actually I guess it'll just be Roy since the other one is in the hospital...or was that Siegfried? Oh well, Viva Las Vegas Baby!