Gettin some love

Well, today was a great day. I received two, count them TWO gig offers. The first gig was from my booker's company, GFI Entertainment, not Jimmy, who is my main booker, but his parter who does colleges called and offered me a gig in October at Chico State University.

Chico State has a special place in my heart because it was my very first paid college gig and my very first gig with GFI or any booker for that matter. It was the fall of 2001 and I was an emcee doing a show with Shang Forbes and Andrew Norelli, both of whom are good friends of mine now. It was a great show and I did well despite being nervous because this was my first big gig. I was even on the poster, which I thought was the tightest thing ever. My mexican side came out, because I stole a poster to bring home and still have it framed in my room (framing it must come from my white side). Plus I got paid $300 to do 15 minutes. So now I'm thinking, damn, comedy pays really well. This is my first gig and I'm already making $300/night. Of course, I quickly learned that most of my other gigs don't pay nearly this much. Most clubs, not all clubs, but most pay lousy. They usually pay me in cheddar cheese and bubble gum. It's the college and corporate gigs that pay the big dinero (that means money in Spanish, geez go to McDonalds sometime and learn some Spanish will ya).

Chico State is also a lot of fun. They have this reputation as a party school, and well...it's a well deserved reputation because they know how to have fun. And when you're out in Chico, CA, I guess there isn't much else to do but party and drink. Chico isn't going to be a big museum and arts place like SF unless all the cows start painting. So Chico is fun, I met alot of cool people there. It's always a nice place when white girls will come up and talk to me. Alot of times they get intimidated around me, or at least until I take my ski mask off.

I'm working on a parody of the Usher song Burn to do. Maybe I can get it polished and bust it out in Chico. Basically the song talks about Burning from Herpes.

The second phone call I received was from the San Diego Comedy Festival. They wanted to know if I would like to perform this week in it. Usually I would have jumped at this chance, because there is a lot of prize money at stake and one can never see too many donkey shows in Tijuana. However, this time I have to say no, because my little brother flies in tomorrow for the week, so I can't drag him down to San Diego. I have to stay here and make him dance for money at Pier 39 in SF. People love when I stand behind him and shout out "Dance monkey, Dance!" while he pops and locks. But he gets a $1 burger after he puts in his 8 hours, so that should keep him happy.

But back to San Diego. They must be hurting for comedians, because I only sent in a registration. I didn't follow up with a press kit because they require a $25 fee and I didn't have $25 to spend. I think we can all agree that midget hookers aren't as cheap as they used to be. They are in high demand these days apparently. So they must be taking anyone, which sucks because that means the competition must not be as tough, making my chance at winning higher.

Tomorrow night is the finals of this Avalon Bay Area Competition that I'm in. I'll keep notes on the other comics and write up an evaluation of the night. It'll either be very positive or very negative, depending on if I win or not. There is $1500 at stake for first place, so I have to bust out the gut buster jokes...well i guess I should write some gut busters first so I can bust them out (HEHEHEHEHE) -imagine me squeeling like a little girl. I have some nice chuckle jokes and jokes that make you go "Ahh, that's very true. This gentleman on stage has a good point. Not funny, but true nonetheless. Where's the waitress? I'm could use another drink. Don't tell me I don't need another drink! You're not my mother!... Don't touch me. (burp) I have to go pee. I'll be back." (HEHEHEHEHEHE)